Sa aming pagbisita sa churches at Christian schools, tila may isang common concern ang mga adults na nangingibabaw sa kanilang mga kabataan. Ito ay ang “being in a relationship but not in a relationship” or “I’m unofficially yours, you’re unofficially mine” ng youth. Ano daw? Ang gulo no? Ako din naguluhan eh.
Ilang mga guro ang nag-describe sa akin ng ganito, “Nakikita namin sila na super close –parang more than friends ang turingan. Pero pag tinanong na namin sila ng kayo na ba? Ang sagot naman nila ay hindi po, friends lang kami.”
Marami pang ibang variations ang observation na ito pero ang puno’t dulo lang ay, tayo sa feelings at actions pero sa salita, hindi. Ang ganitong phenomenon sa mga kabataan ay madalas na tinatawag na Mutual Understanding (MU).
Common sa churches at Christian schools ang rule na “No Boyfriend/Girlfriend Muna” unless nakatapos na ng pag-aaral. Mabuting paalala ang rule na ito pero dahil may pagkatuso ang mga kabataan, nalulusutan nila ang kanilang teachers, youth leaders, at pastors. Pwedeng i-entertain ang feelings ng isa’t isa sa kahit anong paraan basta walang magdedeclare ng official status! Lusot na, enjoy pa!
Enjoy sa unlimited text & call, Facebook chat, todo kwentuhan and sweetness pag magkasama, tapos may uninhibited communicatoin of how much I miss you! at I love you friend! Idagdag pa ang selfies na maaaring may caption na, “With my sweetest ‘friend’ ever. Love you!” (Emphasis mine)
Friends na friends talaga ang turingan!
But the question is, saan tayo dadalhin ng kilig na hatid ng ganitong relasyon? Sa kasalan o kasalanan?
Maybe we can fool people around us by not having an official status but let’s remember that we can never fool God. He knows the deepest desires of our heart and the sins that it can conjure. So when we manipulate our friendly relationships as cover-up for our in-a-relationship status, we are deceiving people around us in order to satisfy our selfish desires. That, by the way, is called lying. Isinama lang naman ni God sa Ten Commandments ang, “Thou shalt not lie.”
Ang punto ko lamang sa post na ito ay, sa kasalanan din nauuwi ang MU relationships. Kaya maraming kabataan ang nagkakaroon ng broken hearts kahit na hindi nagkakaroon ng official boyfriend or girlfriend: wala kasing commitment! Kaya brothers and sisters, bantayan at ingatan natin ng maigi ang ating mga puso. Huwag basta basta magpadala sa bugso ng damdamin. Magisip. Magdasal. Magpigil. Wag muna.
“The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?” Jeremiah 17:9 (ESV)
“My son, pay attention to what I say; listen closely to my words. Do not let them out of your sight, keep them within your heart; for they are life to those who find them and health to a man’s whole body. Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.” Proverbs 4:20-23 (NIV)
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Post by Christin Alvarez, TLW staff. Christin enjoys getting lost in books and the myriad worlds they contain. She likes people but is too shy to talk to them so she just watches and writes about them in her head. You can find letters she has grouped into words at The Road Goes Ever On.
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